January 15, 2016

Marriage + Dating Sites DO NOT = Happiness


This is a personal thought post! 

Psychiatry and Psychology are the study of the minds behaviors. I do not have a degree in either. But for awhile I have been trying to understand the mind of the marital cheater. So far, I have not had much luck.

I am old school. I believe in vows and that they should be kept. Breaking them is not only breaking a vow to your spouse but to God.

So to try to understand, I went on several dating sites and set up fake profiles. I faked alot of the info I put on these sites. I was curious. Is it as easy to cheat as people make it seem? In no way or form was I going to go further than looking and seeing what all the hype was about. It was an eye opener.

Not one person appealed to me. Not just in looks but in any other aspect. Maybe Im picky but not one guy even seemed to be as handsome as my man. I guess maybe Im so into him, I cant see others.

To the curious looker, they are inundated with singles photos and bio's from the moment they create a profile. People within various distances pop up, certain age ranges and more can even make your search specific. Even some of the pictures pop out. Photoshop and photo editing is everywhere.

These "dating" sites make it so easy for any and everyone who is looking, to find someone.

Only one of the sites I looked at ended the sign up if you answered married or legally separated.  ONE! And that was the one that I see most promoted on TV during the day. Most, including the very popular AM, let you keep on going. So even the married answer doesnt deter. Obviously that means that if you answer married, the system doesnt care and the person looking to "connect" doesn't care about the marital issue.

The dating sites make it easy. The world makes it easy. Dating sites, Facebook, Instagram and other sites that have you "hook" into others make it easy. Co-workers, friends and even some family can make it easy.

Keeping strong and committed to your marriage, thats the hard part.

Marriage is a vow no matter if you are a straight couple or a same sex couple. Marriage is hard. Marriage is work. Like the saying goes "If a lightbulb in your home goes out, you fix the bulb. You dont go buy another house".

Our Grandparents and earlier generations had it correct. If something was cracked or broken, you fixed it. You dont quit it. You stick it out and work to repair what needs to be repaired together. One alone cant make it work, it takes two.

That means you stay off the dating sites. You dont go looking and chatting up others on Facebook. You dont hide chats. If you wouldnt be ok with your other half doing it, dont do it!


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